Parshas Chayei Sarah 5786
- Torah Tavlin
- 6 days ago
- 2 min read
ולקחת אשה לבני משם ... (כד-ז)
MASHAL: At the joyous event of his daughter’s sheva berachos, the kallah’s father stood up to speak, and he eloquently weaved the joyous occasion in with Torah-related topics, as well as praises of his daughter - and the chosson. The chosson? Yes! After all, he himself handpicked the chosson.
At the end of his lengthy discourse, he announced that he would like to reveal what it was that made him want this chosson to marry his daughter. There was a hush in the crowd, something exciting after the prolonged speech:
“Not long ago,” he began “this boy was driving me all the way from Jerusalem to Bnei Brak. It was a Friday and there was heavy traffic. As a back seat driver, I was agitated, but then I observed the driver. I couldn’t help but notice how he did not honk the horn even once! This takes extraordinary patience. I thought to myself, this is the type of boy I want for my daughter. It was right then and there that I decided to make this shidduch a reality.” The crowd burst into clapping and singing. This was truly a special trait.
The chosson, on the other hand, turned beet red. He was clearly embarrassed about something. Quietly and under his breath, he murmured, “Umm ... the horn was broken.”
NIMSHAL: Chazal tell us (Sota 2a), “Forty days before the formation of the fetus, a voice from Heaven announces: ‘The daughter of Ploni (so-and-so) will marry Ploni (the man whom the fetus will become)’.” While many of us are familiar with the concept of “bashert”, that really only guarantees one thing: Hashem arranges that you encounter that person. Bashert does not guarantee that you will marry that person, or that the marriage will be a happy and fulfilling one; those depend on your free choice and good character traits.