Parshas Vaeschanan (Nachamu) 5786
- Torah Tavlin
- 1 day ago
- 2 min read
Halachos and Hanhagos Relating to the Churban (5)
Now that the Three Weeks of mourning have ended, it is important to note that there are many relevant halachos dealing with remembering Yerushalayim and the Churban Habayis, during the rest of the year as well, until the coming of the Geulah. The Mishnah Berurah (1) rules that at each weekday meal, when a person washes for bread, he should recite "על נהרות בבל" from Tehillim (137) before bentching. This perek refers to the exile of the Jewish people, as they were leaving Eretz Yisroel and were forced into Galus Bavel. (Even if a person does not wash for bread the entire week, there is room to suggest that he should recite this perek by at least one meal a day, in order to recall the churban.) In that chapter, the following words are recited: “Let my tongue cling to my palate if I do not remember you; If I don’t elevate Jerusalem above my greatest joys.”
At a Wedding. Chazal instituted certain reminders of the bitter exile, to be performed at a wedding ceremony. These include, breaking a glass under the chupah and placing ashes on the head of the groom on the spot where he wears his Tefillin (2). This is done before he walks down to the chupah, and care should be taken that the ashes do not stain his white kittel, which is customarily worn at the chupah. The Taz (3) writes that the person placing the ashes on the head of the chosson (Rosh Yeshivah or family member) should recite the above-mentioned posuk ("תדבק לשוני") and the chosson repeats the words after him. In order to avoid any form of undue aggravation to any family members at this special moment, it is beneficial to have the ashes prepared beforehand (or verify that someone is providing them).
On Shabbos and Yom Tov (or any day that tachanun is not said), we replace "על נהרות בבל" with a different perek, "שיר המעלות" (126) before bentching, which speaks enthusiastically of the future redemption (5), and is more appropriate on these days. If one eats bread on Friday afternoon or erev Rosh Chodesh in the afternoon, he should say this kapital before bentching (6). This also (7) serves to allow him to fulfill the important mitzvah of speaking words of Torah at a meal, as stated in Pirkei Avos (8).
(1) משנה ברורה א:יא (2) ב"ב ס:, אבן העזר סה: (3) או"ח תקס:ד (4) מ"ב שם (5) פרי מגדים או"ח א' (6) ערוך השלחן או"ח קע:א (7) אבות ג:ג