Parshas Pinchos 5785
- Torah Tavlin
- Jul 16
- 3 min read
ובני קרח לא מתו ... (כו-יא) - פרש"י הם היו בעצה תחלה ובשעת המחלקת הרהרו תשובה בלבם עכ"ל
The Baal HaTanya writes (32): “It is a mitzvah to hate (the wicked), and it is a mitzvah to also love them. Both are true. You hate the yetzer hara, the evil inclination that’s in them, and you love the goodness that is concealed in them, which is a spark of G-dliness.” Perhaps the best way to persuade someone to abandon his beliefs is to reject only his beliefs but remain open to the G-dliness and potential in him. With the foundation of a relationship, genuine conversation can take place bringing with it the possibility of persuading someone to abandon or even reject what she had previously believed.
Derek Black was literally raised on hate. His father, Don Black, was the founder of Stormfront, the internet’s largest white supremacist website. His mother, Chloe, had previously been married to David Duke, who was Derek’s godfather. As a young man, Derek launched a popular white nationalist website for children and quickly became a leader in the greater movement. When he spoke at a white supremacist conference, he was introduced as “the leading light of our movement.”
When Derek enrolled in New College of Florida, a top-ranked liberal arts school, he kept his extremist views and KKK affiliation to himself, even while continuing to host his supremacist radio show. One night, a fellow student came across Derek’s picture on a hate site. It didn’t take long for the word to get out and by the next semester he was a pariah. Nobody would talk to him or even come near him and he avoided public places or events for fear of hostility given his views.
One of Derek’s acquaintances started reading Stormfront and listening to Derek’s radio show to get insight into Derek’s thinking. Then he did something radical, unexpected, and uncomfortable. He texted Derek, “What are you doing Friday night?” The classmate was Matthew (Mattis) Stevenson, the only Orthodox Jew in the school. He hosted weekly Shabbos dinners in his campus apartment and decided to invite Derek. Though he initially debated if it was a good idea, he decided if Derek is going to hate Jews, he might as well meet one and know more about them.
Derek accepted the invitation and arrived with a bottle of wine. Nobody at the meal mentioned white nationalism or his involvement with its movement. Derek enjoyed the meal and came back the next week and then the following one, until after a few months his fellow guests at the Shabbos meals became his friends. Eventually, a strong enough relationship was built that the topic of his beliefs could come up. Conversations ensued in which Derek’s beliefs were challenged in a respectful way. His assertions were challenged by data, studies, evidence, and facts and one by one they were dismantled leaving Derek increasingly confused. He stopped posting on Stormfront and gave up his radio show. By his final year of college, he was taking classes in Jewish scripture and feeling totally disconnected to white nationalists and their beliefs.
After graduating, he decided to publicly disavow all that he had formally subscribed to and promoted, and he published a bold statement: “A large section of the community I grew up in believes strongly in white nationalism, and members of my family whom I respect greatly, particularly my father, have long been resolute advocates for that cause. I was not prepared to risk driving a wedge in those relationships. After a great deal of thought since then, I have resolved that it is in the best interests of everyone involved to be honest about my slow but steady disaffiliation from white nationalism. I can’t support a movement that tells me I can’t be a friend to whomever I wish or that other people’s races require me to think of them in a certain way or be suspicious at their advancements. The things I have said as well as my actions have been harmful to people of color, people of Jewish descent, activists striving for opportunity and fairness for all. I am sorry for the damage done.”
When his father saw the post the next day, he told Derek, “You have been hacked.” Derek explained to his father that it was in fact real and was how he felt. His father was in physical pain. He felt betrayed. Their relationship has been frayed and barely existent since then. Derek went on to earn a Master’s degree and essentially build a new identity and life. The young man who was once heir to the mantle of leadership of the entire white supremacist movement became an outspoken opponent of racism, bigotry, anti-Semitism and hatred. How did it happen? An invitation to a Shabbos meal. (NLEResources.com)